“But I loved her first
I held her first
And a place in my heart
Will always be hers”
— Heartland, “I Loved Her First”
This series seeks to establish the roots of the intense connection between fathers and their daughters and how this connection contributes to the family dynamics, wellness and esteem of the girl child.
The Urban Dictionary has seven definitions for daddy’s girl as the term also carries with it some sexual connotation. However, for the purposes of this article I am referring to a father-daughter relationship . Firstly, the dictionary defines daddy’s girl as a girl (adult or child) who has a strong bond with her father, typically the bond to her father is stronger than the bond to her mother. The term may also sometimes infer that she’s been spoiled as a child and a girl who is able to control her parents especially her dad and gets what she wants when she wants it.
In this instance the girl adores her father so much so that the mother feels so left out. The girl is usually the only child in the family or the only girl. I strongly believe that this bond between the girl and her dad is most certainly because of how involved the dad is in his daughter’s life. According to the work of child development expert Norma Radin, women raised with highly involved fathers are more likely to be warm, mature, independent and possess high self-esteem. Will definitely dig deeper into that.
For now I’ll end by looking at some of Copson’s nine signs that one is a daddy’s girl:
1) You’re SO independent… until you need your dad. You’ll happily spiel off your ‘I don’t need a man, I’m so independent’ Beyoncé style speech to anyone that’ll listen. But you know deep down you do need one man…
2) You go to him before your mum. You know the dynamics of the household and your dad is always the first port of call, as your chances of success are almost guaranteed.
3) You do things you kind of hate just to impress him.
4) You try to be the son he never had.
5) You think he’s the funniest and smartest person you know. No one can make you laugh like him and if your dad doesn’t know the answer to something, then what you asked wasn’t a legitimate question.
6) When your friends are telling boyfriend anecdotes, you just share a story about your Dad.
7) The Bank of Dad is your favourite place in the world. No matter how hard you try to pay him back, he insists the loans are paid off in cups of teas and a ‘thank you’ text.
8) You’re in constant battle with your siblings to be his favourite. You secretly revel in any opportunity to show your dad how great you are. Father’s Day cards become less a declaration of your love and more a fierce contest as to who can use the best adjectives.
9) Most importantly, you know when you mess up he’s the one you can turn to.
Are you a Daddy’s Girl?